Something deep down tells me I made the wrong decision... And well I already knew that anyways... I just don't kno how to fix it. I am not good at mending things, especially things involving emotions and people... I can try, but I kno my efforts will be no good. The other person has to be willing too, and well I don't think they are...

I should be getting ready for work, but I don't feel like it. I am beyond tired, emotionally drained... There is so much stress in my life recently, and well I don't deal with stress well. So I've been pushing people away, getting angry easily, smoking alot, trying to run, but it is not working... And I must be vain for a moment, but my skin has never looked better, I'm thinking stress does the total opposite for me haha... eh

I want to highlight my hair, but I need to find a salon first... I want alot of highlights, I need a change. I am not used to this one colorness... Totally not my personality... If I could get a decent job, I'd get teal highlights... But thinking logically that's not smart... We'll see...

OK time to go get ready for work...

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